You Don’t Have to be Insane

Sometimes, when on line or in person someone will pose the question, “What’s the one piece of advice you would give to someone who wants to be a writer?” my answer will be: “Don’t.” I typically phrase it in a jesting tone, because I don’t want to come off as a curmudgeon (there’s plenty to time for that later), but I’m only half-joking. If I were pressed, I would add, “This is ridiculously hard work and it doesn’t pay well. If you’re looking to make money, literally almost any other job would work better.”

“But,” one might reply, “you do it.” Yes, I do, but my excuse is that I got the bug before I realized what I was getting into and by the time I learned, it was far too late. I mean, yes, I was once warned by a friend in the book industry that the chances of success were one in a thousand based on magazine rejection rates, but I heard what I wanted to hear (“You have a chance in a thousand!”) and pushed on. And on.

It’s because I’ve been through that wringer (and am still being wrung out) that I’ve adopted this philosophy. Seriously, if you’re considering a writing career, re-think your values. Now, before it’s too late. If you want my advice, you shouldn’t do it.

And the reason I say that is because if I, your mother, your high school English teacher, or even the editor of Tomorrow is Today spec-fic magazine can persuade you that you shouldn’t be a writer, then, well, you shouldn’t be a writer. (It’s like Holland Taylor to Reese Witherspoon in Legally Blonde: “If you’re going to let one stupid prick ruin your life… you’re not the girl I thought you were.”) The only reason you should be a writer is if writing is in your soul. If it’s an itch that cannot be scratched any other way. If you are so convinced that you were born to write that nobody can tell you otherwise.

Let me be (probably not the first) to tell you that for writers, rejection is a way of life. Every writer I know has tons, and gets them to this day (and I know people who’ve won Hugos and Nebulas). The road to what you call “success” is long and likely never-ending, because “success” is always one step on the ladder above you. it’s like the pyramids; you’ll never finish.

The pay? Laughable for short fiction. Even most novelists can’t make a living at it, and most are one bad book away from obscurity.

On the other hand, it is easier today to be published than ever before (and I’m not including self-publishing). When I started, there were three SFF magazines; today there are thousands. And there are compensations: First, the writing community is tight. They will root for you and you for them every day; it’s not a competition. We’re all on the same team. Second, the joy of a sale is wondrous, and when a fan meets you at a con or asks for an autograph, you feel like a millionaire.

But the bottom line is that you have to believe in you. No matter how many rejections, no matter how few of your friends and family seem to care (really, it’s a matter of not understanding what you do), and maybe worst of all, no matter how many of your peers seem to be passing you by, you have to push on because…well, because you have no choice. It’s write or die.

Or go watch Netflix. It’s your life.

We’ve all heard, “You don’t have to be insane to [be a writer], but it helps.” Actually, it probably doesn’t. What you need to be a writer is not insanity, but obliviousness. You have to oblivious to every negative thing around you and concentrate on what’s inside you. Sometimes you have to be oblivious to your family and friends. You have to believe in the face of all the odds. In another context, we’d say you need “faith.”

So, yes, if you ask me I’m going to tell you not to be a writer. Because if you listen to me and you quit, you were never meant to be one, and if you were meant to be one, you’ll ignore me and call me a curmudgeon. Go on; I’m a writer no matter what you say.

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You’re Going to Pay for that Imposter Syndrome

Although I’ve been around the block a few times (I qualified to join SFWA in 2011, and I’d been attending the School of Hard Knocks and Rejections for some time previous), I haven’t forgotten what it was like to be unpublished and wishing with all my heart that I could change that. Because of that, I can understand how easy it is to fall for some of the scams out there. It’s like weight loss; just take the right prescription and the pounds will melt off, except in our case there’s the Chosen One, the Secret that all published writers know and if you could know it, too, you could be one of them.

There are two reasons I can see why writers fall for these schemes: Ignorance and Imposter Syndrome. The first is obvious. There are so many scams, and so many pre-published writers, that it’s impossible to educate everyone about every pitfall. The second, though, is more insidious: the feeling that you haven’t really earned your place, no matter how much you publish. We all have it, and I’m reliably informed it never really goes away.

That’s not what I want to talk about, though. I’m referring to what you might call “Pre-published Imposter Syndrome” (PPIS), which is not the feeling that you haven’t earned your place, but the feeling that maybe you never will, at least not without help. (Hint no. 1: No one does it without help. But there’s “help,” and there’s help.)

That overwhelming desire to be published, combined with PPIS, is what makes authors vulnerable, and you’re never more easily scammed when you’re vulnerable. Someone finds you at a weak moment and offers you what you’ve always wanted at a price that seems reasonable…and bam. You’re hooked.

Maybe the worst scam–and the one I keep seeing people ask about–is vanity publishing, which is paying someone to publish your book. This is fine if you’re publishing a cookbook that you want to hand out to family and friends, or some other small project which is very personal to you and you simply want to share it. That’s never going to be published by a major company, and you don’t want that anyway. But if you’re looking to sell your novel on the internet or at romance conventions or whatever your plan is, beware.

Number One rule of thumb in the publishing industry is that “money flows to the writer.” You never pay someone to publish your book, no matter how many promises they make about marketing, or editing, or anything else.* Real publishers are out to make money from the sale of your book, not from you. Best case scenario is you pay for a few hundred copies which will sit in your garage, because if you don’t know the right way to get published, it’s a cinch you don’t know how to sell your books. Worst case scenario is you sink hundreds (or thousands) of dollars into a “book deal” that never happens. (Hint no. 2: The better the deal being offered, like “introduction to a movie producer,” the better the chance it’s a scam. And if someone comes to you with an unsolicited offer, it’s definitely a scam.) If you want more specific information, you can find it here.

I know where you are. Every published writer knows where you are. We’ve all been there. But no matter how desperate you get, being taken advantage of and losing all that money you saved up in case you had to self-publish your book, is not going to help.** The Secret to Publishing is hard work and perseverance.

And I’ll give you that advice for free.

*This applies to agents as well as to publishers. Ask me how I know.

**Self-publishing is a perfectly legitimate avenue to pursue. Just make very sure you know what you’re getting into.

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